Summary of the Trip

So I've had some time to process my experiences this past trip and the things I've learned while being over there, but am still processing and have a feeling its going to take awhile to realize how much I was impacted. So this blog is more of thoughts and some things I learned while being over there, so this is going to be a little jumbled up as I'm writing this down and maybe not flow so great.

The biggest thing that I learned was about the approach people/organizations take to try and help countries like Uganda. It was a mindset transformation that I have been gaining from my experiences there. The saddest part was to hear and learn how foreign aid and non government organizations have really hurt a lot of times more than they have helped, while there still are organizations that do tremendous work, but in general all this aid has crippled Uganda and built a dependency/poverty/survival mindset in Uganda that one of the biggest factors contributing to that was the war, but has created a mindset of looking to other people to give them things or provide for them. It isn't bad to receive help, but if that's what you always look to or think is your only way out of your situation, then you'll never learn to provide for yourself or in turn be able to help others.

I liked what one of my Ugandan friends mentioned casually, but really stuck with me, is that "Uganda does not need aid." It does not need aid in the traditional sense of providing free food and throwing financial aid at the country, while that may have been needed initially after the war, but more good examples of working to make a living without receiving financial aid and people to teach them and build them up. This is a form of aid but I don't think its the same as what my Ugandan friend was referring to. They need to learn life skills, for people to help them start business's with integrity, and for people to stop giving them things but help them to work for it.

While I went there to figure out how I can use engineering to help there in the future, I found my view on what to do to be even more scattered than before, but more focused at the same time. While I still don't know or have a very good idea of what I will do there in the future, my focused has changed to what will be more beneficial to Ugandans. I don't want to go there for myself to become some great person that everyone looks to for help to solve their problems or be the leader that everyone has to follow, but really what I would want most is that they don't need me at all in the future. That these business's and organizations that are building up Ugandans and helping to develop the country would be led by Ugandans and that they would get the credit and that their own people would look to each other and trust each other and not foreign aid or white people to solve their problems. As much as I have never wanted to be a teacher or sharing or in that sort of position, I found that this is one of the most essential things needed. I'm not sure if I'll even end up doing engineering there as my main project or at all even. Even though I feel more lost and overwhelmed than before, I'm at the same time sort of at peace more and I've grown and seen that God will take care of it if I just stick to it and trust in him. I don't need to know what I'm going to be doing exactly, but just that I do the task and steps in front of me to the best of my ability and the doors and opportunities will come. Even though it seems like more work, I know that there is something that I can do, where as before I had no idea if I could at all.

The feeling I have after this trip is not excitement and joy to just move there and jump in to working just anywhere. I'm more saddened and humble about working there, I've heard stories about people who get all excited an acting in the moment to rush over there and help but the plans for the long run end up hurting more than there initial intentions even if they were great ones. I have this feeling of responsibility and drive to do it the right way with intentionality, knowing that I can't just go in with my own way of doing things without regard to cause and effects of the tiniest actions I take.

There's small stories even just about the view about giving that we have without regard to the effect that it can have on the people. Such as giving candy/toys to kids, shoes, or even leaving behind clothes a lot of times. While we think we are doing a good thing, candy/toys can take the children's respect and admiration off of their parents who can never afford those things to foreigners. Giving shirts and clothing to kids a lot of times result in older stronger kids beating them up for it out on the streets. Shoes when they wear and are broken after they kid loses the calluses will get cut and bloody feet cause that's what was protecting him before.

I want to help change the view that they have that all whites are rich and don't have to work for their money, cause all they see are people on vacation just spending money and not working and life is really easy for them. Not sure how that would be possible, but just that's one of the ways that would help them have a value to work and not rely on aid if they see the people that aid them working and having struggles like them even if they aren't the exact same struggles.

In short, whatever I do or what I would want anyone else who goes there is to build the people up and teach them and do as little "giving" as possible to help them. Agriculture is a huge thing that needs to develop there. While short term mission trips have there place and I would not be doing things in Africa if I didn't go on one in the first place, they really need people to take the time to help and not just give money and spend shorts amount of time there, because there is a time concept difference and it takes a long time to get things done and short term missions trips are more for the people going than the actual help they do for the people.

There's more I feel like I would like to say but its hard to put it into words for me as I'm still processing. Its hard for me to tell stories and share and I feel like I'm not really giving a picture of how this trip as affected me or how I feel about it and the stories of what I did there when they ask me general questions, but I am trying.